Top 9 Dating Apps and Websites Recommended for Women Over 40 by Relationship Experts
Navigating the realm of online dating in your 40s and beyond presents unique challenges compared to younger age groups. Whether you're divorced, widowed, or simply haven't found the right connection yet, the quest for a meaningful relationship can feel daunting for several reasons.
According to Jess Carbino, PhD, a dating and relationship sociologist with experience at Tinder and Bumble, the opportunities to meet potential partners in person are often more limited as we age. Additionally, Tara Suwinyattichaiporn, PhD, a professor specializing in sexual and interpersonal communications, highlights the challenge of finding someone in a similar life phase.
Fortunately, online dating platforms offer a valuable advantage: efficiency. Unlike traditional methods, which can be time-consuming and unpredictable, online dating algorithms streamline the process by matching users based on compatibility factors such as personality traits, dating preferences, and even political and religious affiliations. This curated approach saves time and increases the likelihood of finding a compatible partner.
One more advantage? Dating apps offer a sense of empowerment. According to Carbino, "Online dating gives [women] a feeling of being in control." Furthermore, Suwinyattichaiporn highlights, "There's no other scenario where you can engage with ten different men simultaneously." (Indeed!) This abundance of choices aids in discovering personal preferences and priorities when seeking a future partner, she elaborates.
Ahead, discover all you need to know about dating beyond 40—along with recommendations for the top apps to download today.
What To Know About Dating Over 40
After 40, “the overwhelming majority of [women] have had significant long-term relationships,” Carbino says. “For these women, the landscape looks different.” It’s more likely that they’ll know what they’re like in a relationship and what they want in a partner.
1
Best Overall Dating Site For People Over 40: eHarmony
Taking the lead is eHarmony, noted by Suwinyattichaiporn as ideal for "women in their forties seeking a more serious connection." With its comprehensive questionnaire shaping its algorithm, eHarmony delivers highly compatible matches, fostering a deeper level of commitment compared to other dating platforms, Suwinyattichaiporn adds.
With a balanced gender ratio, eHarmony attracts individuals genuinely interested in meaningful relationships, distinguishing itself from male-dominated apps primarily focused on casual encounters. Despite the membership fee, Suwinyattichaiporn views it positively, considering it an investment signaling a commitment to finding a long-term partner.
Pros:
- Long questionnaire to match you with compatible partners
- Because you have to pay, you're more likely to meet people who want a serious relationship
Cons:
- The shortest membership option is six months
2
Best Dating App For Cities: Hinge
For those seeking to broaden their dating horizons without diving into serious commitments, Suwinyattichaiporn suggests trying out Hinge. Describing the app as "lighthearted," she highlights its myriad opportunities for users to showcase their personalities through prompts and photo options in profile settings. "It's a platform that encourages humor and individuality," she notes.
Furthermore, users have the flexibility to explore potential matches in different locations. Suwinyattichaiporn has observed that the algorithm tends to prioritize larger urban centers like New York City, Los Angeles, or Austin. However, she acknowledges that individuals residing in smaller towns may encounter more difficulty in finding compatible matches.
Pros:
- Easy to see other people's personalities
- Great for those living in cities
Cons:
- Some matches can only be reached with roses, which eventually start to cost money
3
Best Dating App For The Most Matches: Tinder
Yup, Tinder gets a bad rap, but it's here to stay, and proves well when it comes to quantity over quality. "Tinder allows you to see a lot of people," Suwinyattichaiporn says. "In dating, sometimes it's a numbers game." So, you might have to swipe left (which means pass) through a certain amount of people before you get to someone you're interested in. Buuut, that can also cause some dating app fatigue if you have to spend lots of time scrolling through people each day.
Still, if you're looking for something casual, Tinder is a solid choice. The app is easy to set up, and you can see people right away, Suwinyattichaiporn explains. "Statistically, there's also a lot more diversity on Tinder," she adds.
Pros:
- Great to use when visiting a new city and meeting up with someone there
- With more matches, you can evaluate what you like and dislike in potential partners
Cons:
- It can be tiring to go through so many profiles
4
Best Dating App For Women Who Like To Take Charge: Bumble
Move aside, boys! Women take charge on Bumble, an app where only women can message first. This can weed out men you may not be interested in based on their profiles, since you don't even have to talk to them if you don't want to.
Plus, "Bumble's algorithm is more conservative, in terms of how many matches it shows and how many data points have to match in order for these profiles to be shown on your account," Suwinyattichaiporn says. So, your matches are legit based on science. Then, you can add in your own intuition when deciding who to message.
Pros:
- Women message men first
- Conservative algorithm, so you should be more compatible with your matches than on other dating apps
Cons:
- One month of Bumble's add-ons is pricier than some other apps
5
Best Exclusive Dating App: The League
If you're in your forties or older, you *may* want someone who's in the same boat as you, financially, or even better off. In that case, The League is about to become your bestie. First off, there's an application and waitlist—and while this may seem exclusive, it really does narrow down people who are seriously interested in finding a partner.
Pros:
- You'll be matching with people who are likely well off in their careers and financially
- You can pay for one month at a time
Cons:
- Quite pricey
6
Best Dating App For Non-Monogamous Relationships: Feeld
If you're into untraditional types of dating, Feeld might be for you—from non-monogamous to polyamorous people, there are tons of ways you can explore yourself on this app. "Even though we have this stereotype of women in their forties probably wanting to get serious, get married, have kids, that's not always true," Suwinyattichaiporn says.
Feeld has 20+ different sexuality and gender options, and is also really great if you're thinking you want to get a bit kinky. There are options for seeing how far away someone is, too, as well as when they were last active on the app.
Pros:
- Great for exploring your sexuality
- Inclusive and diverse
Cons:
- Some features are off-limits for non-premium accounts
7
Best Dating App For All Kinds Of Relationships: OkCupid
For all types of relationships, from casual to serious, Suwinyattichaiporn recommends OkCupid. Plus, it's very LGBTQ-friendly! If you're interested in a relationship but you're not willing to commit to eHarmony, this is a great place to start.
The standard plan is free, and it includes personality quizzes, which can help you find better matches. However, to get the most out of the app, you might have to answer a lot of questions so the app can learn your personality.
Pros:
- Awesome app if you're interested in a somewhat serious relationship
- Includes fun personality quizzes
Cons:
- A little more obscure than Tinder or Hinge
8
Best O.G. Dating App: Match
ICYDK, Match has been around since 1995, so it's the O.G. Plus, it "has had a long standing marketing research and product relationship with people in their forties," Carbino says. "They really understand their users and the experience of people who are in their forties."
Your profile can include up to 26 photos, plus, it allows you to select preferences in the person you're looking for. It's now in 24 countries and def helped kick off the dating app industry. Thanks, Match!
Pros:
- Has been around (and yielded success!) for a long time
- Your profile can hold up to 26 photos
Cons:
- Not free
9
Best Dating App For The LGBTQ Community: HER
HER has a great reputation for members of the LGBTQ community, specifically for queer women, says Carbino. "I've heard wonderful things about [HER] from people with whom I've done research," she says.
What's amazing about the app is that it has virtual community-building events, like movie nights, webinars, and other activities. It's inclusive and meant for queer women, lesbian, bi, nonbinary, trans, and gender non-comforming folks.
Pros:
- Offers an incognito mode, so people can't see you without you liking their profile first
- Inclusive community
Cons:
- Pricier than other dating apps
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